Every morning, day and night, people zombiefied people of the world line up at the nearest Starbucks to get their fix of delicious burned coffee mixed with a bunch of sugar and other delicious ingredients. They get seduced by the soothing jazz music, the cranberry bliss bars and the cool socks and sunglasses the hipsters are wearing. I don't know how Starbucks managed to get so big, but I think it's proof that you don't want to mess with Kenny G.

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